On Saying Goodbye

Nicole Lehmann

Hello, my loves. If you've been reading AiF for a while now, you'll know that I never get too heavy with you guys... This is my happy place and I do my best to make it an inspiring place to visit each week, but today I just wouldn't feel right posting an outfit or anything else — so here goes.

Without going into too much detail, my family lost one of its dearest members last week with no warning. We're all shocked and completely devastated, but with today being the funeral, I wanted to take a minute to honour my cousin Nicole here as best as I can.

Nicole has always been someone I looked up to growing up; she was older, infinitely cooler and one of the warmest, most genuine people I've ever met. She was more than just a cousin to me — she was like a sister, and even more than that, a friend. Nicole was with me when I snuck into my very first bar (if you're reading mom, I totally wasn't 16 or anything!), she coached me through first loves and always offered a shoulder to cry on. We even had a nickname for each other — Mou, which means 'my' in Greek (as in 'my Nicole').

Her laugh was infectious and I'll never forget her smile — she just radiated love and joy. Even as I write this I'm in total disbelief that she's actually gone — I feel like at any moment someone is going to scream 'psych!' and tell me it was all just a really bad joke or something. What I wouldn't give for that to be true. It's not an exaggeration to say that the world would be a better place if there were more people like her in it... she was an amazing person and we'll all miss her forever. I love you, Mou.

I've scheduled content for the rest of the week so I can just be with my family and grieve, but thanks for letting me express how I'm feeling here with you today — I love you guys and appreciate your support more than you know... To Nicole!

Nicole Lehmann


  1. I'm so sorry for your loss, Vickie. Thinking of you and your family.

  2. I'm so sorry Vickie! She sounds like a great person! My thoughts are with you and your family!

  3. My heart goes out to you and your family at this sad time. I hope that you will find comfort in the many happy memories. Take care,

  4. I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my cousin unexpectedly almost on year ago (the anniversary of his death is April 4th) and I find that there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about him. My words of advice are to think about all the good times you had with your cousin. Even though I know my cousin is no longer with me all of our memories always bring a smile to my face. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family during this difficult time.

  5. Sorry to hear this sad news. I will remember you and your family in my prayers.

  6. I'm so sorry for your loss Vickie. Big hugs to you xo

  7. Although you may not feel this --- I am sending a giant hug your way. I know death is a very difficult experience and nobody knows the proper way to grieve or how to mend the broken heart that occurs. Whenever I've lost somebody dear to me, I try to remind myself how lucky I was to have known somebody so special at all. Out of billions of people in the world, your cousin loved you and you loved her. It's such a precious bond that can never be taken away from you, not even when it feels like an infinite distance is between you and her. Nicole will always be there -- in the memories you have together -- and in everything you've ever shared together.

    You'll get through this. All my love.